...

Today, when I could've been going to Mass on the holiest of holiest days, Easter Sunday, I sat there in silence for about 10 minutes when I got out of the shower and got dressed, and ended up not going.

What's wrong with me?

Why did I refuse to go? Was it because of the rampant hypocrisy there? That Catholics who would only go to Mass and forget the Faith after would be there? Would it be that?

I don't know, I really don't.

I offended Our Lord & Savior in the most grievous way possible. Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa.

I felt like Judas Iscariot when he betrayed Our Lord the day before Christ was to die. I wanted to die. This needs to never happen again, because now I feel lost.

Sigh.

Cor Jesu sanctissima, miserere nobis.

Sancta Maria, semper virginae, ora pro nobis nunc et in hora mortis nostrae.